Spend some time with someone who gets under your skin.
When I as in college, among the various subjects I studied was physics. I remember very little of that complicated subject, but one concept that sticks with me is that in order to have movement, friction is necessary. Just a quick jaunt down memory lane to the last time my truck as ‘stuck’ in the mud and I fully understand the need for friction in order to move.
The need for friction makes sense in physics. In order for an object, a car for example, to move from one point to the next, friction must exist for there to be sufficient traction for movement to happen. There are obviously many more factors - laws even - at work in the equation needed to get that car moving, but my point about the necessity of friction make sense easily enough.
What brings me to this – and what this is about, really – is pondering the need for friction on an interpersonal level as we attempt to move through life. Without stretching the analogy beyond recognition, I have thought quite a bit recently about how even though I often choose to be around like-minded people, very often it is when I am face-to-face with an individual or idea that just grates on my nerves that I become most passionate, and I know passion moves me. Isn’t it true that we often hone ourselves against the wet-stone of contrast?
So, I hang out this thought today – Should I intentionally seek out times to be around a person, place or thing that I know irritates me? Is a possible solution to ease, and perhaps apathy as simple as forcing myself to experience something I am against?
Should I spend time periodically with someone who gets under my skin?
Very interesting - I had a similar thought a few days ago, u can read about it here, and one more here
ReplyDeleteHere from Netchick.
By the way, I like your policy on comments at your blog. I agree whole heartedly (I doubt if ANY blogger would disagree). Have a great week ahead.
ReplyDeleteJean
From Bangalore.
interesting take away thoughts there. psychic friction causes movement too.
ReplyDeletein writing a novel I was told if there's somewhere your character doesn't want to go, put her there for interesting things to evolve.
My favorite post of yours, so far. My answer is no, don't place yourself in those situations. Life will place you there enough that you don't need to purposely add to it.
ReplyDeleteAs for Pearl's comment about placing characters from novels into those situations...I agree. We are supposed to make our characters squirm. :)
I like Pearls thoughts on writing; however - To answer your question, no, in life you should not seek out friction. As you well know, it will find you no matter how you pretend to hide from it. And once it does find you, the real value of friction becomes apparent, in how you handle it.
ReplyDeleteIf you want to have lunch with me, just ask... ;)
ReplyDeleteMatthew Flinders once wrote the words, "I would take him into the same skin with me..."
ReplyDeleteA Lover shared this quote with me as it sort of became his byline. As our relationship progressed, at certain times, I would be the thorn beneath his skin. Sometimes purposely, necessarily. The "thorn" reminds us that we shouldn't become complacent, or take our surroundings for granted - it reminds us that pain, or an agitation to our being, can become an opportunity for growth, expansion, and for some of us, a chance to liven what might otherwise die or grow numb within us.
Tough question. Certainly finding some traction in one's life is a good thing.. whether we need to engage with that which rubs us the wrong way is debatable.
ReplyDeleteIn the presence of strong emotions, and more often with negative ones, I tend to absorb some of that energy and it can have a negative effect on me.. So, I try not to be with those who cause friction.... Or at least when doing so, I do it consciously.